Friday, January 13, 2006

a rant, and other insanity

haha, my darlings i have returned. well, actually ive been reading the comments for a little while and i just had to say something.
and that something is;
i'm sorry, but you all need to get a life!

well, onto life in general. in summary, iwork i eat i sleep, i tlk to people who would rather not have me bothering them, and i work some more. and i go to the gym. and life goes on and on and on with its sense of inevitability and crushing complacence. but thats for another day, franky i'm not in the mood to pour out my soul's discontent for the purposes of light entertainment.

what i am willing to pour out though is my feeling of pure contempt for the world in general, and hypersensitive teenage girls in particular. i mean, take this poor excuse for a sentient being for example;

"Dear Advice Girl,I have liked this guy for a while and he knows I want him to be my boyfriend. He told me he loves me but he has his eye on some other chick. He knows how badly I love him but he keeps hurting me like this. Should I give up on him or should I just be patient until he wants to be my boyfriend???? PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Signed, Poor Confused Babe

i mean, come on girly, get yourself a life, and a spine, its not life or death. in fact, its not even interesting. more nauseating really. i mean, its this kind of stupidity that really makes me sick, what the guy in question needs is sterilization, and the girl should be boiled in oil. god, why waste your time and energy on such pointless, tiring crap?!
i think, judging by the current climate of our world, and the exponentially declining intelligence of our youth, a new class should be introduced in schools. it shall be called 'humiliation' and be compulsory. in thiss class a humiliator will insult the students for 45minute blocks, in an effort to make them understand how stupid and pathetic they truly are.

this concept could be carried through to the workplace. this idea came to me suddenly at work yesterday when confronted by a pair of the most poncy, unbeleivable people ihave ever seen. the coke reps. youknow the ones that i mean, the 20something blokes with the terribly sensitive faces, the square jaw, rimless glasses, black-sublty-checkered pants, blue-and-white-checkered shirt, fair caramelly hair, delicate ears, comfortable sqaure toed brown leather shoes, straight nose. the ones you see all the time with their satchels on trains in the afternoons with their ears attatched to their incredibly trendy mobile. the ones who you feel should be attractive, but repel every sense purely because they completely lack a spine or any sense of individuality.

these people make their living discussing the relative prominence of theshelves in our fridge. they consciously promote diet products, knowing full well that theyre pumped full of carcinogenic artificial sweeteners and know things like the percentage of total sales accounted for by juice. to me, looking at them was like staring full in the face of evil. i felt at once that it would be good for both of these young men if someone was to come once a week and degrade them before colleagues. thus, they would lose that horrible sense of slimy self satisfaction and be less unpleasant as a result.

anyhow, i should probably stop ranting and go have a nap. or i might go watch th rat man for a while. i'll find something productive todo anyway.
and i will post again soon, when i'm feeling slightly less malevolent and vindicitive
stay tuned


Blogger Mephistopheles said...


Since you are such a strong proponeet of this idea, I'm sure then Kit that you'll have no problem with me starting to put it into practice by loudly abusing and mocking you for said 45 minutes per week.
I shall thoroughly enjoy it, thanks for the tip.

12:25 am  
Blogger Rani-Banani said...

go ahead. everyone else does :P

2:01 am  
Blogger The Jenius said...

Only 45 minutes? Are you saying I'm going to have to cut back?

3:38 pm  
Anonymous bec said...

:O kirani lives

where do you work anyhoo ?

9:24 pm  
Anonymous Sweets said...

Yay, the Rani I miss is back! You went through a "life is beautiful" stage, but its good to see you back with contempt for all mankind, the way it should be.

11:54 pm  
Blogger Rani-Banani said...

thats right, im too tired too contemplate anything but comtempt, its just easier

1:22 am  
Blogger B said...

right, have you heard of, breif, informed stories, rather than yarns what are you 80?

10:30 pm  
Anonymous "a" said...

Oh hang on... I know who you are, "b"!

12:04 am  
Anonymous "c" said...

As do I!

2:41 am  
Anonymous t said...

i have problems with the alphabet

6:26 pm  
Blogger The Jenius said...

Hey there sexy ;)

11:12 pm  
Blogger The Jenius said...

Kirani, are we going to have another problem?

2:09 am  
Blogger Mephistopheles said...

This had better be the last time I have to nudge this.

6:00 pm  
Anonymous Elle said...

Im not gonna comment on that

9:51 pm  
Blogger The Jenius said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:43 am  
Blogger The Jenius said...

Kirani’s Blog Drinking Game

Start when you see this comment. If Kirani doesn’t post in the next five minutes, drink a shot. If she doesn’t post in the next five, take another shot... and so on.

(Ha, let's see if she can live with our livers on her conscience!)

4:44 am  
Anonymous Foolio said...

Yay booze :-)

5:09 am  
Blogger The Jenius said...

ifn wern cant type aist nip teh botherd just givvita pass

unno, i like u folo, ur... good

i like rani to she’s got hair

adn soks

mesipofoles yurs notsim bad yissilf

i lo ve yoo guise...

5:20 am  
Anonymous Elle said...

Riteo..well I havent actually looked at these comments recently..well bout 4 days ago was the last time I looked (thats not recent 2 yeh bout "Kirani's Blog drinking game"...1. r u trying 2 kill us jeffers?lol... 2. ummm well I actually dont hav any booze up in my room atm..oh but theres some vodka cruisers in the fridge..thats bout yeh I cant join in with ur drinking game..well I could but then I'd be dead in like 2 days Im quite happy yeh,,,n if u started this game straight away, wouldn't u be dead by now?lol....thats like hmmm? 24 hrs in a day..well I cant b bothered figuring out how many shots u wouldv had by now..but can assure u that u would be whoops..didnt mean 2 so thats my comment 4 2nite..Nite all n yes I no ur jokin always!! Elle*** P.s. and 2 those alphabet ppl..I no who a n B t...

11:32 pm  
Blogger ElleBelle said...

Woooow..Jeez! Ur date today by the way is the 18th October 2006 ..I thought I'd point that out coz u seem 2 have changed ur blog a tad in the last few days but no new posts?? n think uv deleted a few posts as well...but so have I on away girlie!!????

3:50 pm  

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