hello again.

i just visited my blog after a week or so to find i seem to have created a bit of a furore. its all rather exciting really, isnt it.

i think what i liked most was how personally some of you took a post that was a rant at the world at large. it was pretty typical really. some ignored. some philosophised. some took umbridge and offence. some used it as an excuse to bag me and jeffries used it to bring up his deep disgust with me and issues which i'm not concerned about and dont really want to hear.
so i came away from it thinking pretty much as i did before.

the one thing i am a little worried about is how many of you took this to be a personal attack. there are a few of you who really wouldnt be concerned if i fell off the planet tomorrow, and hell why not? all i'm saying is, dont have the arrogance to beleive i'm going to write about people in my blog who really dont figure in my life at all.

i dont usually feel up for a big bitter winge at you all, but i really do tonight after many many hours of work and it feels right to get this said.

my thoughts are valid.
if you feel like judging me for my morals, my actions, because you dont like things ive done, havent done, or the colour of my hair, go for it.sure i'd prefer you did it privately, but you cant always get what you want, so sure, go for it. just dont expect me to care.

in just a few short weeks i will be out this narrow fetid circle, and you will be free of my presence. there is nothing i am looking forward to more. to those of you i love, you mean the world to me, and i will miss you like something has been cut out of me. i'd say my heart but... well i'll let you finish that one.

i truly beleive that in life it is the little things that matter. its the little things in my life that bring richness, and life and create moments we can remember for the rest of our lives. i truly beleive that each person lives for him or herself, and that life should not be dictated by others. i truly beleive that social conditioning in the present society is unhealthy, that the society itself lacks openess and the ability to allow individuals to act on their own conviction. i truly beleive we live in a modern utopia of binding judgements and false gods.

i also believe that in life you can only make yourself happy, and thats all that matters. if you choose to make yourself happy there is nothing in the world that can stop you. i choose to be happy.

you choose your path, i choose mine. just dont think you have the right to tell me what path i should consider right.

its specific tonight. get bent.